My child is diseased..

Small has an ear infection. Maybe not quite ‘diseased’ but that’s how it feels around here.

Poor bubby has been horridious these past few days – and this morning’s performance at the doctor’s office was right out of a movie. It all started out with runny – yet not gooey – eyes, then a fever, and then just madness.

On the plus side though, Small didn’t sleep at all last night. “That’s a plus?” you may ask – well yes, because my super independent-don’t-need-anyone almost two-year old actually cuddled with Vince and I last night. And even though it does not make me happy that he was in pain, I have to say that I’ll take cuddles and a softer Small any day!

You see, Small was born to just be, he’s never really needed me, depending more on his big brother over mommy. So last night when I held him in my arms, it literally made me cry. God I love this kid! I was gently playing with his hair – something I always want to do but get swatted every time.

Last night, every time I would stop, he would pull my hand up to keep going. He has the most beautiful, soft curly hair. And he smells so good. He doesn’t really let us get too close to actually ‘baby’ him, so I got it all in last night. I cuddled him and loved him as much as he’d let me.

Of course as he was flailing and screeching at the doctor’s this morn, those soft moments were far from memory; but now that I have some time to reflect, it fills my heart to know that inside that tough little exterior, there truly is a baby in there. Small – you amaze me and soon you’ll be all better and right back to your “I can do it all by myself” little man child self, but in my heart you will be my baby forever

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